It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
