its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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