Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize
