Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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