idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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