He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
