You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
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