take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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