Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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