im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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