I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
operation harelip BJ is a go
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
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