i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
In other news, I just burned my penis
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
