I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize