problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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