Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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