hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Randomize
