Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize