And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
