We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
