Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Randomize
