Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
