Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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