fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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