at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
