I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
