So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
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