so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
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