Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
