Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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