Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
