Sry I called you an 8
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
