Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
