so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
