Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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