I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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