Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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