I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Randomize
