Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
