Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
