PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
