It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
