South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
