I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
and she was petting her beer can
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Randomize
