I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Randomize
