porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
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