lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
