How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize