My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
