dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
