are you so shy because you have an std?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
